Perhaps the biggest duty of the Best Man during the reception is giving the all important toast to the new wedded couple. For some, this is the single biggest point of fear in taking on the job because it calls for the Best Man to come up with a great speech and give it in front of a large audience. As the old adage goes, people tend to fear public speaking as much as death, making this task daunting to say the least. However, here are a few great tips for making the toast memorable and successful.
Tip: Talk Briefly About the Past
The special part of a wedding stems from the fact that it is a singular point of origin in time that you and others will refer to for the rest of your lives. It’s the undeniable, most memorable start of a new era, perhaps with the only exception of when that couple becomes parents for the first time. Nevertheless, the wedding day is the start, not the end. There’s no need to expand on the past, or any trials and tribulations people have gone through to get to that point. The important emotion that everyone is feeling is the fact that they are at something singularly unique, something previous and something fleeting. Going back and talking about ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends is passe and frankly in bad taste.
Tip: Talk a Lot About the Future
While you don’t want to go on predicting a million kids or huge fame and fortune, the tone of the wedding is hope, love and togetherness. These three elements should be the basis for all the prognosticating you do during the speech for the happy couple’s future. Fill them with hope, fill them with love, fill them with the knowledge that they will not be along on their journey – that everyone on-hand will be there with them along the way. Talking about the future, as opposed to the past, lends the tone of the speech to a romanticism that many in the audience will latch onto and enjoy.
Tip: Don’t Wing It
There’s a common trick in show business that dupes the audience into thinking that an act was all made up on the spot and improvised when in fact it was a thoughtful and explicit attempt at interacting with the audience. The greatest showmen always make it look easy, as if they made it up on the spot. Those that know better understand that many hours of practice, thought and planning win the day. You must take this approach to your speech as “winging it” will simply not be good enough. You are the best man, not the best improvisational orator, so act accordingly and prepare. Practice your speech, think about the thoughts and emotions you want people to feel and don’t be afraid to get back some feedback from other groomsmen. Give the happy couple the respect of a thoughtful speech, not something you put together seconds before being handed the microphone.
Tip: Watch the Drinking
People say stupid things when they drink, a practically indisputable fact of science and life. The last thing a Best Man should have happen during his toast is to let something slip that nobody else should hear. Be it a curse word or some story a certain someone wanted dead and buried long ago there’s always something that could possibly slip. You’re supposed to be the guy looking out for the guy getting married so he doesn’t have to worry about anything else. Man up, be responsible and represent yourself like a true gentleman when giving the toast at the reception.
