Maid of Honor Jitters: A First timer’s Survival Guide

Of course I have dreamed of my wedding day from the time I learned that there could be an entire day dedicated to celebrating falling in love. Not so common is the dream or even thought of being asked to stand at the side of a bride on that special day, as the Maid of Honor. My cousin recently got engaged to her boyfriend of 3 years and truth be told I had an inkling of what was coming my way. We have grown up at each other’s side, always promising to be one another’s Maid of Honor. Now that the time is here and after the tears of joy have been shed, the reality of the position begins to emerge. I am 25 years old and this is my first time as Maid of Honor. Luckily for me I am surrounded by a gigantic family of women who have been in countless weddings and are able to offer me a plethora of solid advice. To those of you like myself who are embarking on their first MOH experience, I offer you a survival guide for the Maid of Honor jitters.

· GET ORGANIZED. For the bride this is a stressful yet exciting time in her life. She might be going in 50 directions at once but as MOH do what you can to lighten the load. Take control of the other Bridesmaids by scheduling fittings and communicating dates with the bridal party. Make sure you are always in the know with tastings, fittings and parties as you may be required to attend such things if the bride so desires.

· BE PROACTIVE. As MOH you are the bride’s right hand woman. As dates come closer help the bride by assuring invitations are sent on time, help manage the guest list, and get together with the bridesmaid’s early to begin planning the bachelorette party and bridal showers. Make sure events of her wedding are well-thought out and memorable for the bride.

· ATTENTION TO DETAIL. As leader of the bridesmaids it is important that you keep everyone, including the bride, in check. Check in with the other bridesmaids to make sure they have gotten their dress, hotel and any other arrangements squared away before the wedding. If you are asked to be a part of the pre-wedding activities, document the couple’s journey. Take pictures along the way or just see that opportune photos are not being lost.

· BE HONEST. This may be the hardest of all but the most essential. Be honest with your bride. Yes it will be difficult when the bride asked your opinion with a twinkle in her eye, but if the hairpiece she is considering is way too much for her simple gown, tell her! The last thing you want is for the bride to look back at her pictures and ask how you could let her walk down the aisle in that?!

· DIRECT RESPONSIBILITIES. Here things can get a little cloudy. Talk with your bride. Ask her what she needs from you and what you are able to give. MOH has various responsibilities in different cultures. For example, in my Latin culture it is customary for the MOH to buy the cake. MOH also plans the Bachelorette party with the other bridesmaids, helps to plan the Bridal shower with the bride’s mother and pays for her entire bridal outfit.

· DAY OF WEDDING. Here is your time to shine. Start early and make sure all of the bridesmaids are on time. Give enough time for hair, make-up and dress to be styled to perfection an hour before the wedding. Check-in with the wedding planner at the location and help organize the bridal party into formation. Keep the bride calm and as stress free as possible. Ensure that she is taken care of during the wedding (doesn’t forget to eat) and simply be attentive and helpful to her the entire day.

· LISTEN. You are the MOH so chances are you mean a lot to the bride. Listen to her and just be there for her throughout the entire process. Things get a lot easier if we have a friend to stand by our side during the big transitions of our lives.

Jade Arvizu

Jade Arvizu

Featured Contributor at Bridal Hot List
Jade is a featured contributor at Bridal Hot List and holds a Bachelor’s Degree in English from UCLA with a minor in Film, Television and Digital Media. She lives in Santa Monica California where she enjoys the perks of coastal living mixed with the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles life.
Jade Arvizu
Jade Arvizu

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